~Ha-HeePrime

I've had two almost opposite things on my mind lately, and I thought that, in my typical fashion, I would go off about them. I'm spouting off here because - gasp! - neither one is TF-related.

First of all, I invite you all to celebrate with me! Seriously, this is the best unexpected thing to happen in... ages. I NEVER would have thought it possible.

WE GOT A PIANO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (+ more)

So, most of you probably know because of my constant and annoying whining, that we're not rolling in any kind of dough around here. A piano, even a junker used one, was so completely out of our reach financially that I never even gave buying one a real thought. BUT. Check out these remarkably coinciding circumstances. Ironhide went on a long, unplanned bike-ride to an area to which we seldom go. He happened to pass by and notice the going-out-of-business sign on a piano store. He decided to go in. For that one glorious time of the year, we had some money saved, because of our tax return. So if this had happened at any other time, we'd have been broke, as usual. We have a friend who is a piano teacher, who has studied, along with her dad, the fine art of piano tuning. She checked the innards of all the pianos in the store, and found one that she really recommended as sound and good quality. So We Bought It! We sacrificed a couple summer camping/LARPing trips to do so, but those will come again, dang it. This chance never would. And the store guys moved it to our house For Free, and the owner will come tune it For Free in a month, after it's settled in here.

I have learned - and forgoten - how to play the piano twice before. Very frustrating. But this time I am determined. I will have a piano there in the living room every day, and my love of playing it will draw me in to practicing...
See, I can plink things out by ear, and LOVE doing so. But I have the hardest time remembering which specific note on the keyboard those little dots refer to. I'm hoping that, if I keep at it, I won't forget again.

Guys, I LOVE playing music. In the absence of a piano, I'd play those little $1 recorders, just to be able to make some music - of sorts. I am SOOOOO GRATEFUL that this came to be. It is such a blessing. I am very happy. I practiced well today. And the boys are interested in learning along with me. And my baby daughter LOVES the piano, and comes as close to playing pretty music as her little fingers let her, dancing up and down in excitement.



Now, For The Ranting Portion...

This will be about PREJUDUCE...
Specifically, about my upstairs neighbors. I can't even spew too loudly in my own house, because it's summer, and all the windows are open, and they'll hear. I don't hate them, I just feel sorry for them, wonder how they can live as they do, and hate that they are teaching their children to follow in their footsteps.
So, here's where I come from: Honest-to-Primus, every Latino person that I have ever had for a neighbor or otherwise known, was literally a much braver, more generous, loving, and caring person that I will ever be. I admire my friends and neighbors who came from south of the border. I'm not naive; I do know that there are people that are not so stellar out there. But they come in all colors and from all heritages; not just "from Mexico." I just can't subscribe to the "They should all go back where they came from, Us vs. Them philosophies I hear shouted, after some of the things I've heard. These are PEOPLE, people, just like you and me!!!!! Try and remember that, OK?
I have tried as long as I was aware of the concept to avoid being prejudiced myself, and sometimes wondered if I was doing a poor job of it. I was telling one of my black friends about my frustration when I noticed myself becoming painfully careful whenever I was around anybody who was black, and how I wished we'd just drop all of this racial stuff since the world is so mixed and varied anyway (But of course that'll never happen - it's too hard for us all to forget. Shame.)
But when new people moved in upstairs (they have no internet, so I doubt they'll ever see this...), I realized just how well I'd been doing in comparison. The first time I saw how they felt was one evening when my children and I were outside, and ran into them out in the backyard. Across the way, a Latino family had put together a really fun outdoor dinner with music. I was watching them, thinking how they seemed so much better at the whole family activities and outdoor party kind of thing than I was, and also liking their music - I don't like a lot of that style of music, but I liked what they had on a lot, and was interested. Into the middle of my contemplation, the two new little girls from upstairs started commenting. They hated that music, and wished they'd turn it off. They hated Spanish. Their mom piped in with something about why did they have to be outside. I was taken aback; I said something about how I wished I'd learned Spanish because it would come in so handy now, and their mom replied stuffily, "I'M teaching my girls FRENCH." Seeing those innocent little girls parroting their parents unreasoning hatred really angered me.
A few days later, the parents were angrily blaming the 12-ish year-old boy next door for breaking off the hood ornament from their old van. Since he has always seemed to me to be the most kind and decent boy of his age that I have ever met, I stood up for him firmly. They had no idea who'd done it; they just assumed it was him, because he was Latino. They blame "Mexicans" for doing the husband out of a bunch of jobs. I don't know the circumstances, but isn't it the employer who fired him and his motivations that they should be complaining about, not the person who took his place?
Ironhide and I may be dysfunctional in our own ways - unmotivated and such - but AT LEAST WE DON'T BLAME OUR PROBLEMS ON OTHER PEOPLE!!! And at least We Are HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have never met people who lived more deeply cowering in fear than these new neighbors of mine do. It hurts my heart to watch them. Along with the blaming of everyone else for their problems, they seem constantly to worry that people and life in general are waiting to spring more terrible problems on them. Both the husband and wife seem, from things they've said, to have had very hard childhoods, and I assume that much of their fear and hatred comes from that. But the energy they expend in fearing! I cannot fathom living at that level of stress. (Granted, I'm one of the least-stressing people I've known, but still!) They told me I shouldn't let my children or myself go barefoot, for fear of parasites. (I'll take me chances. Doctors can fix parasites; not wearing shoes is WORTH IT!!!) They are always telling me about people and places to watch out for or avoid, because they suspect child molesters there. They worry that "The State" is out to get their children. They are homeschooling for all the wrong reasons - fear, fear, and fear. I was homeschooled up until college, and I am familiar with the fear, and the deleterious effect it has on the children involved, so I Hate watching them cower, and pass it on... (I came out OK -*twitch*- honest! I'll homeschool my children if any of them need it. Second-generation is easier - you know you can avoid the fanaticism!)

Anyway... It's hard for me to watch parents making mistakes. I KNOW Ironhide and I make mistakes, all the time; all parents do. But some are more serious than others. I comfort myself with comparing how much better we are at parenting - and "spousing," for that matter - than we were a few years ago. I hope that the same sort of peace and content and calm can come to our neighbors. I really do.

Thanks for reading.

Prime Out.